I am more than this: Exhibit at Worcester PopUp creates portrait of struggles – Worcester Telegram

WORCESTER After Gloucester artist Amy Kerr wrote a blog about grappling with depression late in 2016, she was surprised both by the support she received from people and how some of them talked candidly about what they had been going through.

"I struggled for a long time and was not at all public about it. It was kept in my immediate family," she said. But she was struck by the thought, " 'I am more than this.' It was important for me to let people know it (depression) was not my defining feature."

As people shared their own struggles, Kerr came up with an idea of creating a series of portraits featuring individuals of all ages, with all kinds of struggles, who would write a piece to accompany their portrait describing how they were a lot more than their mental, physical or social challenges.

On Oct. 19, the Worcester PopUp, 20 Franklin St., will host the first public unveiling of "I Am More: Massachusetts," 20 new paintings of individuals from around Massachusetts accompanied by essays to remind us that we shouldn't be defined by a specific life circumstance or situation there is much more to "us."

The opening celebration is from 5 to 8 p.m. Saturday, and the exhibition runs from Oct. 19 through Nov. 7. Gallery hours are Tuesdays through Thursdays noon to 4 p.m. The Worcester PopUp also hosts a number of different events during which people can view "I Am More: Massachusetts."

The pastel and colored pencil portraits feature the subjects in their favorite place, accompanied by an essay about how they are more than their postpartum depression, brain cancer, anxiety, addiction, poverty, eating disorder, spinal cord injury, insecurity, sexual abuse, schizoaffective disorder, depression, obsessive compulsive disorder, suicide (essay written by a mother), learning disabilities, bullying, PTSD, and surviving the Holocaust. Participants come from Worcester, Westboro, Littleton, Burlington, Mattapan, Lynn, Reading, Leverett, Amherst, Wenham, Feeding Hills, Peabody, Lawrence, Gloucester, Newburyport and Mashpee. The portraits are a warm and inviting depiction of the person. Their essays are inspiring.

Sometimes others define us, or "we define ourselves. I think it's just talking about it with each other. We need that reminder ('I Am More')," Kerr said.

"I am more than my postpartum depression. I am a sister and daughter who would do anything for her family," writes one of the subjects in her essay I am more than my postpartum depression. I am a mother who holds her daughters hand every single day "

In the initial "I Am More" project, Kerr accumulated 16 portraits of people she mostly knew in the Cape Ann community. As Kerr has put it, in January 2107, she "got off the couch and started drawing." The portraits and accompanying essays have toured local healthcare facilities, schools, libraries, nonprofits and performing arts venues. "It was a healthy venture for me," Kerr said. And the exhibition was so well received that Kerr decided to extend the project to the rest of the state.

The new 20 "I Am More: Massachusetts" portraits were gradually put together from 2018 until being completed just a few weeks ago. The exhibition includes a Kerr self-portrait.

"Worcester seemed like the natural central place to have the unveiling so all could attend," she said. Although the subjects have seen their portraits online, "they haven't seen the portraits face to face. It will be an opportunity to have a lot of them in one room going through it together."

However, the subjects are only identified by their first name, out of respect for privacy. "There are a couple who are more public figures. I just had a general rule of using first names. If they want to be more public, then it's not my place to do that," Kerr said.

She recalled that her first attempt to recruit a subject for "I Am More" in the Gloucester area told her " ' I don't have any more right now," and declined to take part. Later, "he came back and said 'if it will help someone I'll do it' Once you get one person it's easier to get others. In the original series I knew a lot of the people."

The "I Am More" opening in the Cape Ann community was "overwhelming."

"I don't think people (attending) knew what they were getting into. In this case, you're reading the intimate details of someone's life. I wasn't expecting the number of people who wanted to share not necessarily their stories, but as a family member. There were a lot of heavy conversations, but not in a depressing way 'now I have some ideas about how I can help them cope.' "

For the statewide "I Am More: Massachusetts," Kerr's approach included contacting nonprofit organizations and treatment centers inquiring if people would be interested in becoming subjects. With privacy a paramount issue, "they'd have to approach me," she said.

From that, she would invite people to meet her at a place where they felt comfortable.

"I never knew what was going to come out of the conversation, but people were so open to me I was stunned to be so privileged," she said.

For the portrait, Kerr would take a photograph of the subjects at a location of their choice. "I've never said no," she said of the places she's taken photographs even in the ocean with a waterproof camera.

"My request was that I choose the image. I'd go home and draw the image, and they'd go home and write at the same time. It was just mind blowing every time the way they expressed themselves. I was just stunned at how well everyone was able to express different histories," Kerr said.

Subject by subject, "I Am More Massachusetts" "became an organic impression of people and topics," she said.

Two of the subjects are from Worcester, including Ryan M. Kerr hopes that Worcester-area schools and nonprofits will be participating in the exhibit, and there will also be opportunities for the public to participate. The nature of the Worcester PopUp intended as a creative catalyst and support space that hosts interactive exhibitions, performances, workshops and community meetings is a great environment for the exhibition, she said. "The idea is to create a space where people can come and talk about the issues and get information."

After Worcester, "I Am More: Massachusetts" will be traveling to Lawrence, the North Shore, Amherst and Boston through 2020.

Contact Richard Duckett at richard.duckett@telegram.com. Follow him on Twitter @TGRDuckett.

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I am more than this: Exhibit at Worcester PopUp creates portrait of struggles - Worcester Telegram