Chattanooga mental health experts share tips on dealing with grief, stress of holiday season amid COVID-19 – Chattanooga Times Free Press

Staff photo by Troy Stolt / Christmas decorations are seen in downtown Cleveland, Tenn., on Sunday, Dec. 20, 2020.

The holiday blues is an annual phenomenon, as levels of stress and depression rise around the winter season. But as this expected stress collides with a 2020 holiday period in the midst of a global pandemic, local mental health experts and advocates said people should be extra mindful of what they are feeling.

Kathy Milam, president of the Chattanooga chapter of the National Alliance on Mental Illness, said people should understand that feelings of isolation or depression this holiday season are normal.

"On any given holiday, people experience isolation around the holidays," Milam said. "Maybe they don't have money to travel. Maybe they aren't close with their family. And maybe they don't want to visit them for the holidays. All that is amplified this year with the pandemic. Feeling blue around this holiday season is a normal reaction to an abnormal situation this year."

A July poll from the Kaiser Family Foundation found that 53% of adults in the United States said stress and worry about COVID-19 were negatively impacting their mental health, up from 32% in March. A June study from the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention found the pandemic caused higher levels of mental health conditions, especially among people of color, essential workers and younger adults. This led to an increase in substance use and thoughts of suicide, the study found.

Local mental health advocates said people should identify and honor their feelings, as well as work on self-care. These next few weeks can be an opportunity to establish new traditions, Milam said.

Lucilla Nash, clinician for the Horton-Keller Center for Traumatic Healing, said staying active is important. Movement whether it is walking, running or yoga can help people deal with stress and release energy, she said.

National Suicide Prevention LifeLine:1-800-273-8255

Hamilton County Crisis Services:1-800-704-2651 (for adults in crisis)

The National Alliance on Mental Illness HelpLine:1-800-950-NAMI (6264)

When asked to stay at home because of the pandemic, Nash said, people should establish a routine to provide structure to days and keep them focused. Part of that routine can be keeping social contacts, either with physical distance or with virtual means, Nash said.

"It's real important that, as much as we can, to try and maintain contact with each other but in a new way," Nash said. "We have to be innovative in how we conduct ourselves with our loved ones because we, unfortunately, can't hug and touch and all those things."

Nash and Milam both identified warning signs to be watchful for in ourselves or with loved ones that can indicate someone may be struggling mentally and need some assistance. Becoming isolated or relationally distant, being more irritable, loss of interest in usual activities and a preoccupation with death can all be signs that someone needs help.

If a person is struggling, approach with compassion, Nash said. Vocalize the change in behavior and ask what is going on, she said. Someone who wants to help can even talk about some of the challenges they are facing as a way to open the conversation.

Nash cautioned against pushing too hard if the other person is not ready to talk. These conversations can be messy, especially as some emotions or feelings are difficult to articulate.

"If we come across in a confrontational fashion, then that could diminish their desire to want to speak on it," Nash said. "They know that something is different. They know that something is not quite right. But they just may not feel comfortable talking about it. For some of us, the whole topic of mental health, it's not a place where people just readily discuss if they're feeling depressed or if they're feeling anxious. They didn't talk about it before so it would be unrealistic to think all of a sudden they have this skill set to be able to express their feelings."

This holiday season comes also as hundreds of families in the region are dealing with the recent death of a loved one, from either the COVID-19 pandemic or other causes. Milam said the grief that comes with a first holiday apart is normal and identifying the painful emotions can be a way to honor the person who died.

"The grief around the loss of a loved one at this time of the year can be very intense," she said. "The holidays bring so many memories of loved ones first Christmases, trips, family get-togethers, things that remind us of loved ones that we've lost and it's a trigger for the pain that we feel when they are not here. That's completely normal and it's important to allow yourself to feel that emotion and it's important to have total compassion [for] yourself and let yourself experience those feelings."

Contact Wyatt Massey at wmassey@timesfreepress.com or 423-757-6249. Follow him on Twitter @news4mass.

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Chattanooga mental health experts share tips on dealing with grief, stress of holiday season amid COVID-19 - Chattanooga Times Free Press